This Is What I See When I Look at Shopping Mall Directory Maps

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Here’s my attempt at humor that came to mind while being dragged shopping again, in the name of baby gear research. (I get really whiny when made to shop…)

500 stores, and nothing to buy. Am I the only one?

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  1. You forgot to add restroom to that! LOL.

  2. too funny. couldn’t agree more.

  3. What’s a mall? 😉

  4. Totally right

  5. Agree with Brian, what’s a mall? Everything is online now.

  6. Only thing I would add is it’s a good place to walk on a rainy/cold day, especially if you have young kids. The key is to not let the wife stray too far.

    I also use the mall occasionally to try on or physically inspect something I want to buy. Then I compare costs with my smartphone and usually end up buying the product on Amazon.

  7. Too funny. I see someone has already started HIS nesting habits!

  8. I’m usually exhausted just traveling to the mall and finding parking. We spent a lot of time in Babies R Us (BRU) before our child was born. Now we buy everything from Amazon.

  9. me too even I am a woman. it seems people following this blog had the same personality. I will have headache after mall. I usuall don’t buy stuff.

  10. I agree with your comment and the replies…I’m retired and I have no need to go to a mall for anything. I shop online or support the local small businesses plus I live near outlets. I can get a fix there if I feel the need to exercise my wallet.

  11. That minus the apple store.

  12. I’m the exact same way. I avoid going to the mall at all costs. If I do go, there are literally 3 or 4 stores that I would bother going in myself. The rest of the time it is just tagging along with whoever I’m there with. I’m just not big on shopping.

  13. Since having my kid, I have ONLY gone to a mall to visit the Apple store. I pretty much buy my clothes online and return anything that doesn’t fit. Seriously, I tried bringing her into a changing room once and that was traumatic. So… much… screaming… But I do recommend Stroller Strides for getting out, meeting people and exercising after the baby. It works well until they are fairly mobile. In cold climates, Stroller Strides does their workouts in indoor malls.

  14. I don’t think I’ve been to a mall since the invention of the internet.

  15. I kind of like going to the mall to get my free Godiva chocolate of the month.

  16. rock13979 says

    And the mall by me you have to pay $3.00 to park. If i have to go I park 2 blocks away in the Lowes parking lot.

  17. I would have colored the Apple store blue…..

  18. Shannon Rose says

    Hahaha, so true!!!

  19. A good friend properly corrected me in all future references to a shopping mall: it’s a shopping MAUL, as in the experience is so horrendous.

    Happy Easter Weekend!

  20. Alexandria says


    I’d have painted the whole place blue, but for the “cheap Thai place” and the bathrooms. A good place to walk. I’d imagine it is 10+ years since I bought anything at a mall. I don’t go there to buy things, that is for sure. (Nor to look at things to buy?)

    Our mall has good restaurants, which is the primary reason I ever go there (the other one has cheap movies). BUT, I stay away from both in December. It’s hell to even drive past, any times any day, in December.

  21. If disover ever bring back it’s holiday mall promo, I’d also highlight the mall office where you can buy multiple $500 visa giftcards.

  22. Jonathan, Jonathan, Jonathan! Did you read my letter about baby gear? You’re way too shrewd to let the baby stuff industry suck you in. By the way, only Americans “baby proof” their house. In Europe they laugh at us for doing that.

  23. That minus the apple store is what I see. I should check out the apple store next time I go shopping.

  24. You forgot Brookstone to get a free massage!

  25. hawks5999 says

    buk… stoar
    boook… stoorr
    buyk… stoare

    I’m sorry what is that other thing you mentioned?

  26. Jenna, Adaptu Community Manager says

    Too funny! Just shared with my friend who works at Apple. Water fountain?

  27. I love physical bookstores… even if it is Barnes & Noble and not an awesome used bookstore. I’m kind of sad my kids may never see one at this rate. I can’t complain too much, I rarely buy anything at Barnes at their full retail prices (but do occasionally).

    Restrooms and water fountains are easily located by the food court. 🙂

  28. Market Timer says

    Mine would be similar except the Apple store would also be coded purple.

  29. Nice.

    I haven’t been to the mall for a while.

    I actually often like to do my clothing shopping at the mall. I find its easier for me that way since I can hit the sales / clearance racks at 3-4 major anchor stores and see a variety of stuff in one trip.

    We have a Lego store in our mall and I always like to go browse there and I always end up nostalgically wishing we had a Lego store when I was 12 years old.

  30. The first thing that came to my mind when seeing the title of the post is the Millcreek Mall in Erie, PA. The mall map looks like a handgun. The rumor is that the mob built the mall and designed it that way. I have no idea if it is true or not but the map really does look like a gun.

  31. Don’t even bother going to the mall. If it’s not online or at costco/farmer’s market, I probably don’t want it.

  32. Eric Jacobson says

    Jonathan, I too like physical bookstores, especially the used books kind. Ours has a play area with books for children, an extra perk. The tightwad in me wakes up though when I have to decide, do I spend $4 plus tax on this book and get it now or go home and order it online for $2 and no tax.

    As the others have said, the mall can be a lifesaver when you are looking for free entertainment for the kids and the weather is poor.

  33. You’re not the only one. Sometimes Best Buy can be briefly interesting too.

  34. Bookstores are awesome with kids. Just to make sure they’re around for a while, I spend about 5-10 per visit. Just returned the apple tv I purchased – not so much value compared to the roku box.

  35. Throw in Starbucks and I’m with you. My wife on the other hand…

  36. Tyrone Biggums says

    You are lucky that you have a Thai place in your Food Court. The only Asian restaurants I see in any Food court are Chinese or the occasional Japanese. I would love to see more Thai, Indian, or Viet options.

  37. I just see the cheap place at the food court and maybe Old Navy if that’s part of that particular mall.

  38. I feel exactly the same way. I sometimes just stand in front of the Apple Store in awe of how many people are inside vs. other stores like clothes, shoes, etc. There are usually at least a hundred or so people walking around, looking at stuff, waiting for geniuses, etc. I think we’re seeing the shift away from physical goods to digital goods. I could care less about the kind of clothes or shoes I have, but I demand the fastest, most reliable technology and thus far Apple has fit the bill.

  39. Well, I check out Macy’s for shoes, jewelry, and clinique skin care products. Occasionally check out the clothes when on sale–big on sale. I also check out JCPEnney for clothes. I have to try on the clothes to see if all my body fat could be consealed and touch the fabric texture before buying. Other fashion stores in the mall don’t have my size and body shape. Thus, they are invisible to me. All other type of items, I don’t know their functions and thus don’t even bother to check them out. On the opposite, my husband likes shopping and checking things out. We are kind of trans gender, I laugh. Thanks to my husband for doing that.

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