This Is What I See When I Look at Shopping Mall Directory Maps
Here’s my attempt at humor that came to mind while being dragged shopping again, in the name of baby gear research. (I get really whiny when made to shop…)
500 stores, and nothing to buy. Am I the only one?
By Jonathan Ping | Funny | 4/6/12, 2:01am
April 6th, 2012 at 4:14 am
You forgot to add restroom to that! LOL.
April 6th, 2012 at 4:25 am
too funny. couldn’t agree more.
April 6th, 2012 at 4:33 am
What’s a mall?
April 6th, 2012 at 5:11 am
Totally right
April 6th, 2012 at 5:24 am
Agree with Brian, what’s a mall? Everything is online now.
April 6th, 2012 at 5:50 am
Only thing I would add is it’s a good place to walk on a rainy/cold day, especially if you have young kids. The key is to not let the wife stray too far.
I also use the mall occasionally to try on or physically inspect something I want to buy. Then I compare costs with my smartphone and usually end up buying the product on Amazon.
April 6th, 2012 at 6:09 am
Too funny. I see someone has already started HIS nesting habits!
April 6th, 2012 at 6:12 am
I’m usually exhausted just traveling to the mall and finding parking. We spent a lot of time in Babies R Us (BRU) before our child was born. Now we buy everything from Amazon.
April 6th, 2012 at 6:36 am
me too even I am a woman. it seems people following this blog had the same personality. I will have headache after mall. I usuall don’t buy stuff.
April 6th, 2012 at 6:44 am
I agree with your comment and the replies…I’m retired and I have no need to go to a mall for anything. I shop online or support the local small businesses plus I live near outlets. I can get a fix there if I feel the need to exercise my wallet.
April 6th, 2012 at 6:50 am
That minus the apple store.
April 6th, 2012 at 7:03 am
I’m the exact same way. I avoid going to the mall at all costs. If I do go, there are literally 3 or 4 stores that I would bother going in myself. The rest of the time it is just tagging along with whoever I’m there with. I’m just not big on shopping.
April 6th, 2012 at 7:27 am
Since having my kid, I have ONLY gone to a mall to visit the Apple store. I pretty much buy my clothes online and return anything that doesn’t fit. Seriously, I tried bringing her into a changing room once and that was traumatic. So… much… screaming… But I do recommend Stroller Strides for getting out, meeting people and exercising after the baby. It works well until they are fairly mobile. In cold climates, Stroller Strides does their workouts in indoor malls.
April 6th, 2012 at 7:45 am
I don’t think I’ve been to a mall since the invention of the internet.
April 6th, 2012 at 7:55 am
I kind of like going to the mall to get my free Godiva chocolate of the month.
April 6th, 2012 at 8:01 am
And the mall by me you have to pay $3.00 to park. If i have to go I park 2 blocks away in the Lowes parking lot.
April 6th, 2012 at 8:05 am
I would have colored the Apple store blue…..
April 6th, 2012 at 8:10 am
Hahaha, so true!!!
April 6th, 2012 at 8:28 am
A good friend properly corrected me in all future references to a shopping mall: it’s a shopping MAUL, as in the experience is so horrendous.
Happy Easter Weekend!
April 6th, 2012 at 8:40 am
Ha!
I’d have painted the whole place blue, but for the “cheap Thai place” and the bathrooms. A good place to walk. I’d imagine it is 10+ years since I bought anything at a mall. I don’t go there to buy things, that is for sure. (Nor to look at things to buy?)
Our mall has good restaurants, which is the primary reason I ever go there (the other one has cheap movies). BUT, I stay away from both in December. It’s hell to even drive past, any times any day, in December.
April 6th, 2012 at 9:07 am
If disover ever bring back it’s holiday mall promo, I’d also highlight the mall office where you can buy multiple $500 visa giftcards.
April 6th, 2012 at 10:25 am
Jonathan, Jonathan, Jonathan! Did you read my letter about baby gear? You’re way too shrewd to let the baby stuff industry suck you in. By the way, only Americans “baby proof” their house. In Europe they laugh at us for doing that.
April 6th, 2012 at 11:36 am
That minus the apple store is what I see. I should check out the apple store next time I go shopping.
April 6th, 2012 at 11:56 am
You forgot Brookstone to get a free massage!
April 6th, 2012 at 12:33 pm
buk… stoar
boook… stoorr
buyk… stoare
I’m sorry what is that other thing you mentioned?
April 6th, 2012 at 2:23 pm
Too funny! Just shared with my friend who works at Apple. Water fountain?
April 6th, 2012 at 2:55 pm
I love physical bookstores… even if it is Barnes & Noble and not an awesome used bookstore. I’m kind of sad my kids may never see one at this rate. I can’t complain too much, I rarely buy anything at Barnes at their full retail prices (but do occasionally).
Restrooms and water fountains are easily located by the food court.
April 6th, 2012 at 4:24 pm
Mine would be similar except the Apple store would also be coded purple.
April 6th, 2012 at 4:27 pm
Nice.
I haven’t been to the mall for a while.
I actually often like to do my clothing shopping at the mall. I find its easier for me that way since I can hit the sales / clearance racks at 3-4 major anchor stores and see a variety of stuff in one trip.
We have a Lego store in our mall and I always like to go browse there and I always end up nostalgically wishing we had a Lego store when I was 12 years old.
April 6th, 2012 at 4:37 pm
The first thing that came to my mind when seeing the title of the post is the Millcreek Mall in Erie, PA. The mall map looks like a handgun. The rumor is that the mob built the mall and designed it that way. I have no idea if it is true or not but the map really does look like a gun.
April 7th, 2012 at 12:09 am
Don’t even bother going to the mall. If it’s not online or at costco/farmer’s market, I probably don’t want it.
April 7th, 2012 at 5:57 am
Jonathan, I too like physical bookstores, especially the used books kind. Ours has a play area with books for children, an extra perk. The tightwad in me wakes up though when I have to decide, do I spend $4 plus tax on this book and get it now or go home and order it online for $2 and no tax.
As the others have said, the mall can be a lifesaver when you are looking for free entertainment for the kids and the weather is poor.
April 7th, 2012 at 10:45 am
You’re not the only one. Sometimes Best Buy can be briefly interesting too.
April 7th, 2012 at 4:36 pm
Bookstores are awesome with kids. Just to make sure they’re around for a while, I spend about 5-10 per visit. Just returned the apple tv I purchased – not so much value compared to the roku box.
April 7th, 2012 at 8:00 pm
Throw in Starbucks and I’m with you. My wife on the other hand…
April 10th, 2012 at 8:50 am
You are lucky that you have a Thai place in your Food Court. The only Asian restaurants I see in any Food court are Chinese or the occasional Japanese. I would love to see more Thai, Indian, or Viet options.
April 10th, 2012 at 11:04 pm
I just see the cheap place at the food court and maybe Old Navy if that’s part of that particular mall.
April 11th, 2012 at 1:38 am
I feel exactly the same way. I sometimes just stand in front of the Apple Store in awe of how many people are inside vs. other stores like clothes, shoes, etc. There are usually at least a hundred or so people walking around, looking at stuff, waiting for geniuses, etc. I think we’re seeing the shift away from physical goods to digital goods. I could care less about the kind of clothes or shoes I have, but I demand the fastest, most reliable technology and thus far Apple has fit the bill.
April 11th, 2012 at 11:17 pm
Well, I check out Macy’s for shoes, jewelry, and clinique skin care products. Occasionally check out the clothes when on sale–big on sale. I also check out JCPEnney for clothes. I have to try on the clothes to see if all my body fat could be consealed and touch the fabric texture before buying. Other fashion stores in the mall don’t have my size and body shape. Thus, they are invisible to me. All other type of items, I don’t know their functions and thus don’t even bother to check them out. On the opposite, my husband likes shopping and checking things out. We are kind of trans gender, I laugh. Thanks to my husband for doing that.